Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Speech Buddy for Persuasive speech
Please post your speech buddy critique here. I want it to be content oriented. Where are the places that the argument are weak? Did your partner forget to cite? Use a transition? Create a logical argument? Where are the places that the argument is strong? Give examples and instructional feedback to your partner.
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Denise did a great speech on becoming a vegetarian and it did not have any weak points in it. All of her points were explained well and made sense to her topic. While explaining her points she always remembered to cite properly. Her cites were always stated and backed up the message being conveyed in that particular point. Also while going from point to point she used transitions as needed. In addition she had a logical argument which she related to us, the audience. She discussed saving money something we all want to do and how to get vegetarian food on campus. The only thing she needs to work on is looking at the power point and playing with her note card during her speech. Other than that Denise did a really good persuasive speech. Great job Denise!
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ReplyDeleteOn November 4, 2010 Steve DeLuke, derived his Persuasive Speech on developing a Needle Exchange Program. When Steve began his speech the first thing that I notices was how well dressed he was and how he seemed as if he was ready to deliver his speech. When Steve begins his speech I didn’t seem to understand what it was that he was trying to persuade the audience to do until later when I asked. In his power Point it was unable to see what was on it because of the colors of the background. He also did not follow the methods of Persuasion I did not see any ethos, pathos, or logos within his speech. He also did not connect with the audience throughout his speech he kept talking either to his cards or the smart board.
ReplyDeleteThere were also many positives in Steve’s speech he knew his information, he intergraded his sources well and he was ready to deliver his speech. Just a few things that I would recommend for his next speech is to be careful of the colors I pick for my power point because if the audience can’t see it they might not follow where he is going with his speech. Also I would recommend that he try to give a little more eye contact when talking to reassure his audience that he knows what he is talking about and this will also engage his audience more into his topic and try to end with a memorial statement. However overall I believe that Steve has improved much from the summer and he should keep it up.
Blain’s speech was very well thought out. First of all Blain was very well dressed…He persuaded the audience to not use a cell phone while driving. He started off his speech with a really good attention grabber; it really caught everyone’s eye, and even scared a few people in the audience. The reaction of the audience showed that his attention grabber was really good. When he started his intro I clearly heard his thesis, and all of his main points, but I didn’t hear the credibility, that is something he needs to work on. Also he had a well written preview sentence. As he reached the body of his speech everything he said was supported by sources, he cited them properly as well. When he went from problem, to solution, and to practicality, he had transitions that made his speech very conversational. He had a very strong argument; we can all relate to this, we see how dangerous using a cell phone is while driving. His conclusion was really good too, he showed action by telling the audience to go on the website that he provided in his PowerPoint. There were only a few things he had to work on. He was a little to much on the note cards, and like I said before I did not hear credibility in his intro, so he has to work on those two things. Overall Blain did a really good job; it was a very interesting speech.
ReplyDeleteJoe’s speech was very well written. He cited throughout his whole presentation as well as his slide show, he was dressed very professionally, and his conclusion was very well executed. It was very persuasive/ informative and his quotes did a good job at supporting all of his ideas. The only problem with his speech was that he tended to look at his Power Point slides a little too much. His speech also seemed to consist mostly of quotes and facts but not enough of his own words. The fact that he took a great deal of time finding citations was apparent, it just seemed as though he needed more of himself in his presentation. Besides these things he did a very good job; well done Joe.
ReplyDeleteWalter did a great speech on legalizing gay marriage. He started off with a shocking video on gay marriage that really captured the audience’s attention. All of his points were explained in depth and detail about his problem, plan, and practicality. His powerpoint was very good but he needed stronger transitions. Walter kept strong eye contact and had a conversational tone. Walter had a hard task of making the topic relatable to the audience and being practical. He did a very good job though by suggesting going to the Gay Straight Alliance meetings. He only forgot to tell the audience when and where the meetings were held. Walter made it very easy to understand his plan. Overall Walter did a great job at taking a controversial topic and making it simple. Good job Walter!
ReplyDeleteJeremy’s speech was well planned out and organized. He used the right transitions to simply make the speech flow smoothly from one point to another. His attention getter or video was really good because it caught my attention and made me want to listen to what he had to say. Jeremy’s voice was at an appropriate, satisfactory level which gave him a conversational style tone all up until he stumbled a little, but then again it wasn’t too bad. Throughout the entire speech, Jeremy had exceptional eye contact. There were times that he didn’t look at the audience so much and got stuck on the note cards a bit too much and too long, but he did manage to pick his head back up when he needed.
ReplyDeleteJeremy did all of his research which was really good, as his speech made an impact when he used a reference to President Obama. He used direct quotes from different sources and supported his ideas. The only real flaw about Jeremy’s speech was that it seemed like the speech was a bit rushed. He talked kind of quick in which he should have taken his time and slowed down just a little bit. Overall Jeremy did a fine job of presenting his speech. He followed the format, used supporting details and real life examples. I always knew it was bad to use the “R” word and hardly ever used it, but thanks to Jeremy I now see the significance as well as the ignorance people behold of the situation. Thanks again Jeremy…job well done!
Bridget’s persuasive speech was fantastic. Her attention getter was good and her intro was better. She paused and stuttered only a little bit but this was a hard speech to write for everybody even Bridget. She had a very conversational tone and her connectives were smooth and flowed very well with the rest of her speech. She had great eye contact but she could have looked at everyone in the room and not just one side. Her speech was very organized with her Needs, Plans and Practicalities in that order. She never looked at the board and kept her audience’s attention the whole time. Her action towards the end of her speech was very detailed and she was one of the only people in the class to really do this effectively. There is not really anything bad to say about Bridget’s speech or performance. She puts a lot of work into her speeches and it shows. Great Job Bridget!
ReplyDeleteMatt’s speech about “Eating Healthy” was very relevant to his audience. He made his information and topic something that his audience is currently experiencing. For his first plan, problem, and practicality he did site well. For his second problem he did site but it could have been a little stronger. He failed to site for his second plan. The plan needed a little bit more detail to it for example, what the gym classes were and/or the schedule for them. For his third plan he needed a little more detail just to enforce what he wanted people to do. He failed to site for his second practicality and for his last practicality he just needed more details. It would have been more helpful if he had added a stronger action for the audience in his conclusion. Despite this Matt still managed to give a good presentation. He was dressed appropriately and was prepared with his note cards and slideshow. Good job Matt!
ReplyDeleteJennifer's Speech on Animal Cruelty was very interesting, and I must say she did a very good job. One of Jennifer's worst weaknesses is her presentation to the crowd. What I mean by this is that she appeared very fidgety and uncomfortable at times while she presented her speech. Another thing she should work on is not taking too many pauses throughout the speech, practicing her speech more would probably solve that problem, or maybe even not being so nervous. One thing that Jennifer did very good on during her speech was her conversational style and the way she projected her voice, it commanded attention which helped the audience to focus more on her, and she also had a very nice slide show presentation. Another thing I liked about her speech was the action at the end, and the topic was able to be applied to our every day lives, and this would make alot of people want to go to the website and be advocates for stopping animal cruelty. Over-all her speech was great. Keep up the Good Work Jen!!!
ReplyDeleteOn Tuesday Remzy presented his persuasive speech about Children and how the television influences them. He made us understand that children will imitate everything they see because they are kids and they do not any better. He did a very good job with his speech. He came dressed and prepared. Usually when he presents his speech he is quiet and does not seem comfortable but this speech he blew everyone away. He was prepared; spoke in a loud and very conversational manner. He had many cites and to support his argument. His plans and benefits were very creative but they could have been more cites for those. He had great eye contact and really made a connection with the audience. Although this was a persuasive speech he still made us laugh and feel comfortable about what he was speaking about. Many people were on their note cards because they did not “know their stuff” but Remzy made sure he did not use his note cards like a lot of other people did, the only time he used them was when he needed to cite something for his argument. I loved the action plan at the end of the speech and it really helped to say that you would email more information to us. Good Job Remzy! Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteFelicity did a great job with her speech on the effect of divorce on children. She dressed professionally, and appeared as a creditable source up there. She had a good visual aid; she put good material on her power point slides. She had a really good eye contact with the audience; and made everyone on every corner of the room feel included as she did not limit her eye contact to a certain part of the room. Additionally, she had outstanding projection; I could hear her very well and I sit at the back of the class. When we get to the content of her speech, her attention getter was outstanding. It grabbed most of the class’s attention as well as mine. And then she stated the shocking statistic, “the death of a parent is less devastating to a child than a divorce”, to show us how bad divorce of one’s parents affects children. She had good connectives so it was clear when she moved through her need, plan, and practicality. She used the story of her family throughout the speech and that added to her creditability and brought and emotional factor in to her speech. The speech was very good overall but she could have made it better if she had a clearer preview statement and a better “call to action”. Great job Felicity!
ReplyDeleteJohn Bowden presented a speech about racism to our class. Although his attire did not mean business, his attitude did. John presented strong arguments and points to the audience. As college students we could all relate to being the victim of racism, and John did an excellent job of bringing the correlation between students and stopping racism. He clearly showed us ways of stopping racism and providing a plethora of ideas. His argument was extremely strong throughout; I could not really pick out a flaw. He had touched on every point regarding racism among us, and showed us many different ways of preventing it. I especially like the idea of sitting with different kids at lunch everyday, not only because it stops racism, but also provides great networking opportunities. I feel that John could have mentioned some clubs on campus that we could join or be a part of. Although he gave us a huge amount of activities and ideas like different lunch tables, posters, etc., I feel that he could of showed us who runs organizations and programs like that. Overall though, john was a fantastic persuasive speaker!
ReplyDeleteI watched Duanne Neal do his persuasive speech, nut I believe he did not work up to his potential. He had an amazing introduction using the video as an attention getter. The video was too long though. He lacked siting his sources and I felt like I was robbed because he had a great idea but he didn’t make the speech as well as he could. He did not site his picture. He had a nice conversational voice and looked nice. He seemed like he put the speech together before class and overall did not do to well.
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